While sipping my soy vanilla latte with an extra shot, it was a late night, and waiting for a friend to show despite the likelihood of her having overslept, I find a seat on the outdoor patio of a busy coffee shop in the valley. Now this is not just any coffee shop. We're not talking the overexposed, heavily marketed chains like Starbucks or even Coffee Bean and Tea Leaf. This is Priscilla's in Burbank. Go here if you don't believe me it actually exists. http://www.priscillascoffee.com As I sip away I pull out my computer to pound on the keys and try and get some "work" done. A couple of old men who are clearly regulars sit to the table next to mine. Of course I'm half listening and wondering if they come here every morning for a nice cup of coffee and to discuss their issues. Suddenly an old beat up white van pulls up on the corner and a woman driver yells through the passenger window at one of the men like she knows him. The men look at each other inquisitively. The woman drives off and the old men comment on how some crazy lady is mad at somebody but it ain't one of them. Mistaken identity or shameful lie?
I get back to pounding away at my keyboard and trying to get a hold of my sleeping friend on my little keyboard. Then up walks a lady with a large black rolling duffle bag. She asks me to borrow a chair, she lays down the bag between the old men and I. One of the old men turns around to greet the woman and another stands to give her a big hug. She then appears next to me asking if she can move my table and myself over a bit. Being the courteous patron that I strive to be, I moved over. Then as she opens her bag she starts pulling out some sort of contraption. Now I'm hooked. I can't take my eyes away. It's like there's porn on the television. The woman sets up this seat and then it hits me. Wait a minute, she has scrubs on and this comfortable looking contraption. Upon the reclined forward seat the woman sits down and leans forward placing her face in the padded holder. She's a freaking masseuse. Since when are there masseuses that show up at coffee shops? Is this the new trend? I thought that was only at big studio seminars like that one they did at Sony and required all employees to attend. "Let's try to save the environment and to reward your attempts you get a free massage with leave of absence from work." Lucky bastards.
I get back to work clearly trying to not get distracted by a masseuse only a couple feet from me. Of course she has to set up directly next to me out of all the areas on the patio. One of the old men says goodbye to his friends and gets up to bid farewell to the masseuse. Instead of a hug it's this big awkward "bash brothers" forearm five with a peck on the cheek. Definitely the first time I've seen that one. Why not just a nice awkward hug with the pat on the back for good measure? My older cousin is a pro at this. It's like I go home for the holidays and my mother and I joke about whose going get the pat hug first. I mean are you supposed to match the pat or go in for a real bear hug and make the other person feel really awkward. I'll save this for another post about affection.
After this awkward exchange, a woman sits down for a massage. Now I've had a massage at several spa centers and by a college friend of mine in training. But nothing quite compares to what I bore witness to. She ran her fingers up and down the woman's back with outstretched arms like she was a mentally challenged ballerina. But her face is what was so unforgettable. Closed eyes, her head slowly bobbing back and forth, and I mean she was really getting into it. I know I'm weird but wow. Only in Los Angeles.
